While on the topic of my birthday, I am so excited!! It's coming up real soon, I'll for sure post about it the day of so stay tuned! I'll be turning 19 this year. My goal is to at least have a job by then, i've applied to like 30 places already. Haven't.... heard back from a single one, but I digress. I've done all I can.
"I'm not falling behind or running late."
Anyways, I'll be 19. And I'm hoping this birthday is better than last year's. Honestly, I don't thin it can get worse, I'll be surprised if it does. My 18th birthday was unfortunately awful.
I cut my face on accident shaving, right before the party. I was already frustrated I couldn't seem to get a halfway decent pic of my outfit. (best outfit I ever wore, mind you). I was on my period. I found out that the park I go to every birthday, and really the only place here decent enough, got rid of the like, only swingset we have in this city.
Really, why would they do that? Reminds me that I'll need to choose a new location for my birthday this year. Ugh.
Also, my older sister was there, but all for like 30 minutes. She left hella early, on my 18th, because she had a local show to attend. And that was when things were good between us. Then my mom and aunt had me take pictures and I was so over it, nothing was coming out right. I was already irritated by my previous failure to get a good pic of myself. And then my cake, oh goodness, my cake. So I already really dislike cake, texture issues and it's too sweet. But I wanted one finally, I asked for a Strawberry Shortcake. We paid extra for fresh strawberries.
Oh my gosh, guys it was awful. Halfway into the party, we cut into the cake and, "This is not strawberry shortcake like we ordered, these strawberries are molding." Hello???? The whole cake got tossed away. I literally cried as it got dark, and my dad's mother was being annoying as always.
So as I said, last year's 18th was horrendous.
But, nevertheless, I am hopeful for this year. There's no way it can be worse than last year.
It'll be a little weird, it's going to be my first birthday without my older sister there. But yknow, that was the decision she made. I've been without her since April. And it will probably be best for her to not be present for my birthday. She made the decision to shut me out, to not be part of my life anymore.
I've got things steady right now. I'm recovering from an eating disorder, I'm putting in the effort to find somewhere to work, I've got the best friend in the world, I have a decent friend group I'm a part of.
"For the first time, I'm thinkin' past tomorrow."
Can you tell I rewatched Hamilton today?
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